Saw my hip surgeon today for results of my arthrogram. I have a detached labrum with a large tear. Surgery is 11/11. He wanted to do it sooner, but he only operates on Mondays. He has two locations that he operates, but he likes to do his osteoplasties at a specific location and he’s only there on certain Mondays. So we’re stuck with 11/11.
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Matt kidnapped me today and took me to the Arboretum for some much needed fresh air. It’s not forest bathing in the Wissahickon, but they have loaner wheelchairs and paved surfaces so it’ll have to do. It was good for my soul.
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Recovery is going (mostly) well. But this weekend was tough. It is hard not to overdue it at times, especially with two high energy kids running around the house. It’s also strange being home but not being able to contribute. I’m just sort of hobbling around trying to not get accidentally hurt. By Sunday night I was feeling pretty depressed.
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Intellectually I know my productivity does not define me. Nor does my job. But this has been a really huge shift for me and a hard one to internalize. In addition, I’m missing out on all my favorite autumnal activities, and it’s kind of breaking my heart.
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Ultimately though, I’m learning resiliency, flexibility, and vulnerability. I listened to Brené Browns TED Talk on “The power of vulnerability” and it really resonated with me, especially in the season I’m in. Learning how to be gentle with myself while seeking opportunities for connection throughout my situation. It’s a whole process of grace, compassion, and balancing boundaries with vulnerability. Your baby girl’s growing up 🍁
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